“I am God, the God of your father. Do not be afraid to go down to Egypt, for there I will make you into a great nation. I myself will go down with you to Egypt, and I will also bring you up again.”- Genesis 46:3-4
A gentle reminder for my heart as the coming weeks seem so daunting. The anticipation of meeting Dasah and knowing goodbyes may come all too soon are overwhelming. And most days just thinking of that makes my heart grow faint.
“When my spirit grows faith within me, you know my way.” – Psalm 142:3
Yes, He knows my way. As He knew the way of Joseph, Jacob, David… He not only knows but goes with us. Had Jacob known what was coming for his people, I doubt he would have gone down (Exodus 1:8-14). And yet, all he needed to know was the promise. The promise in that moment that God Himself would go down with him (Jacob) and that He would also bring him up. The promise was for Jacob, and the promise was for his people. The years Jacob and his people would be in Egypt and what would become of them were not known. But what was known was God’s presence and His promise. And that’s all they needed to follow God. Is that all I need today to follow God today? Is that all you need today to follow God? Is the promise of His presence, which is just as true as it was for Jacob and Joseph as it is for me, enough? I find myself wanting to know how the coming weeks will unfold. I want to know if Dasah will be born alive, if she’ll live for days and we’ll get to bring her home. I want to know if I’ll come home once again with empty arms, or if God will perform a miracle of healing unlike any we’ve ever seen. I want to know how He’ll produce peace and joy in our hearts if we have to say goodbye and how He will sustain us if we find ourselves again standing at the gravesite of another daughter. These uncertainties, fears, hopes and longings fill my mind and heart often unexpectedly and I confess I dwell on them too long many times instead of entrusting them to the Lord. I try to make sense of what’s to come and how I will respond instead of trusting that the Lord goes with me, with us, and that’s all I really need to know right now. And if the worst comes, not only does He go down with us, but He will also bring us up. If even more intense grief, sorrow and loss is to be a part of our journey a little over 3 weeks from now our God will meet us in it and He will bring us up out of it. In the midst of the grief that still resides in my heart in the loss of Sophie, I have watched Him sustain us in the midst of our sorrow and lift up our hearts ever so slowly as time has gone on. And I am reminded of that today. That I serve a God who goes with us, to the depths of our pain, meeting us there and slowly ever so slowly planting seeds of new life. May I trust in that truth today when my mind and heart is tempted to wander to all the “what if’s” and how will i ever walk through what’s coming. He is with us. He is with Kevin. He is with Dasah. And we are very much not alone.
Question for reflection:
- Is His presence enough for you today? Why or why not?
Tomorrow’s Passage (Day 24)
David in Psalm 42… My husband, Kevin will be writing on what it means to HOPE in who God is and not what He does. Get excited, I know I am!