2 Corinthians 12: 1-10
Today marks 1 week until Dasah is born, one week until she enters our arms, one week until we find out just how quickly she may then enter the arms of Jesus. It’s hard not to think ahead to those days. Perhaps as you’ve been reading these devotionals you’ve noted that theme for me… allowing God to meet me today and not getting overwhelmed by what may be coming. I often spend far too much time trying to think of how God will sustain me THEN rather than how he is sustaining me NOW.
“Therefore do not be anxious, saying ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. BUT seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness and ALL these things will be added to you. THEREFORE do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. (true story) Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.” – Matthew 6:31-34
He knows. He knows. He knows. He knows what I need, when I need it and how I need it. His grace is SUFFICIENT for me, for his power is made perfect in my weakness. 2 Corinthians 12 :9 (paraphrase)
His GRACE… his favor, his kindness, all given to me because of NOTHING I’ve done to deserve it and NOTHING I can do to earn it.
IS SUFFICIENT… is enough for me today. He is unfailing in the strength that his grace brings and gives. SO sufficient, so enough, so powerful that I need not even ask for the removal of that for which I need his grace for because the very fact that his grace is enough IN IT means that I can walk IN IT. Because of his power, not my own. His power being made perfect in the midst of my weakness and utter awareness of my need for his sustaining and sufficient grace to enable me to endure today and what’s ahead. His grace is enough. Enough for me today. Enough for the moments where the tension of grief and sorrow rises in our marriage and we find ourselves in the midst of conflict. Enough when we made a build-a-bear for Dasah with her heartbeat inside, much like her sisters and all the memories of that moment flooded back. Enough when Kevin and I had sweet moments of connection and even laughter as we dealt with conflict only to discover we then felt more understood, more known, more loved by one another. Enough when we read to Dasah at night from “Hinds feet and High Places” and tears flowed freely as we reached the part where the Great Shepherd gives Much-Afraid Sorrow and Suffering as her companions to reach the high places. And just as her initial cry was “No Shepherd, this can’t be from you”, she resolves herself to know and walk in the love of her shepherd and follow him no matter what, so our hearts feel much like Much Afraid. And his grace is enough for us in those honest moments with him of feeling the same cry of “No, this can’t be the way” as he moves us to wrestle with his love and ultimately begin to know him more fully. I could go on and on how each day, at the end of the day as Kevin and I are praying I find myself thanking the Lord for yet another day that his grace has been sufficient. Sufficient in the moments of great sorrow where I’m curled up in a ball on my bed in tears thinking of what may come and sufficient in the moments of great joy that come each day as we celebrate Dasah, as friends surround us, caring for us, laughing with us and crying with us. And sufficient when I’m reading God’s word, listening to praise music and hope and joy overwhelm my soul in such a way that it could truly only come from a hope rooted in Jesus. It’s not as though each day is hard. Some are harder than others, always there is a heaviness that is around us, and yet, in each day his grace has sustained, given strength, hope and power in our weakness. Today, his grace is enough.
Yet, how often do we look ahead and wonder…
how will I survive when…
how will I survive if…
if? when? how?
will his grace be enough then?
Why do I know this even though I don’t always live in this truth? Because his grace is enough for me today. And it was enough for me yesterday and the day before and 14 months ago when I said hello and goodbye to my first daughter, his grace was enough then. And it was enough when I stood at her gravesite beside her tiny casket. And it was enough each day after that as I slowly, ever so slowly discovered more of who God is and what it means to just lean into his grace in this season. And it was enough on the day we found out that we would be walking a similar journey with Dasah. Sometimes I wonder how I made it through the last 6 months. It was and is his grace. And so I’m tempted to wonder, often somewhat fearfully, how will I make it through the next week. The next month. The holidays. And it will be his grace, just as it is today. I don’t know how his grace will sustain me a week from now and the fear comes when I try to figure out how he will do it instead of simply trusting that he will do it. It’s a promise, for you and for me. His grace is enough.
Nancy Guthrie, who also lost two children, writes in her book Hearing Jesus Speak into Your Sorrow:
“During the season when David and I were dealing with the daily uncertainties of caring for children who were going to die, people would sometimes say to us, ‘I don’t know how you are doing this. I could never do it.’ Often we would respond by saying something that sounded a bit shocking, perhaps. ‘You’re right. You couldn’t do it… God has not given you the grace for it because you don’t need it, at least not right now,’ we would say, pausing before continuing. ‘But know this: when you do need it, he will give you all the grace you need.’ That is what we’ve experienced– always enough grace for the difficulty of that day, and more grace for the next day, as we needed it. We’ve learned — not only because God promises it in his Word, but because we’ve experienced it firsthand in the lowest places of life– that the grace God has provided is all we have needed. It has been enough for whatever we have faced. The grace God provides is enough to generate joy in the midst of your great sorrow. It’s enough to enable you to endure the loneliness and the reminders of loss everywhere you turn. It’s enough to keep you believing that God is good and that he loves you. What Jesus said to Paul, he also says to you and me: ‘My grace is enough for you today and for everything you will face in the days to come. It will be enough — I will be enough — for whatever I allow into your life.'”
Let’s lean into that grace today. I know I need to.
Questions for Reflection:
- How have you seen his grace sufficient for you today?
- What future worries, fears are you forgetting that he will give you grace to sustain you if and only if he asks you to walk through those?
Tomorrow’s Passage (Day 6)
David in 2 Samuel 22
Some sweet moments of Celebrating Dasah this past week… Happy 38 weeks Dasah!
Making our Dasah bear… Dasah’s heartbeat was recorded and we put it in the bear! Hopefully we’ll get to hear her cry and we’ll add that to the bear too!
Of course, not to be completely outdone by her big sister Sophie, who was serenaded by 98 degrees… we wanted to make sure Dasah got to go to a boy band concert too! So Dasah got her boy band on… Boyz II Men style! (Her mom may or may not know the words to almost all of their songs…) And yes, we did cover her ears for a few of their songs. So this week we took her to Epcot to tour around the world at the Food & Wine Festival and enjoy experiencing her first boy band!
Latest posts by Lindsey Dennis (see all)
- A Taste of Hope Fulfilled – Briella Dawn’s Birth Story - August 3, 2018
- My Journey To Writing A Book - June 8, 2018
- Pregnancy After Loss, When “Normal” Isn’t Your Normal - May 30, 2018